Tuesday, April 20


i woke this morning with aching eyes. my head pounding.
i toss off the covers and look out the window.
the sun is waking up.
it takes longer than i do.
maybe the sun stretches behind the mountains and
 splashes water on its face before showing itself to the world.
i walk to the bathroom and splash some cold water on my face also.
in the car the sun blinds me the whole way to school. thats what i get.
but i like this.

at lunch liz and i come home to see the kittens.
my cat: it had three kittens over the weekend. we are trying to find them homes.
a gray one. a black one. a spotted one.
they snuggle up next to their mama. burrying their tiny faces in her fur.
i pet my cat, so proud. she purrs.
my dad startles me. i forgot, today is tuesday.

i tell tasmyne:
i think theres something wrong with me. she agrees.
in my mind i imagine doctors opening me up to find whatever it is.
my insides as clock pieces, constantly ticking.
but theres a broken pieces.
one in my head, one in my heart.
maybe if they took those out everything would tick the way its supposed to.
but maybe its okay to tick differently?

my eyes look up to meet those of a boy.
that boy.
can't help but adore him.
awkward hello's, always.
old man? bodyguard? we're in deep with the mob.

we get through our spanish class with talk of hogwarts.
and i am content.

back at home i throw myself onto my mom's bed.
kick my boots off.
we talk and laugh and laugh.
things are good.

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