Monday, May 3

sure things

this last week i learned...
when you cry, truths come out that you could never admit to yourself before.
sometimes the only thing that makes any sense is music turned up loud. loud. loud.
you can get through anything if you distract yourself.
apple pie and vanilla ice cream can be the most wonderful remedy in the world.
no matter how many distractions you have the ache is still there.

but i've burried all that ache down deep.
i put all of it in the suitcase, pulled off the side of the road, burried it.
i don't want to see it. any of it. its not fair to have to have to see all of it and hurt so much. its not fair to have so much of it left in my life and none in yours. its not fair to be the only one hurting and i don't want to hurt.
maybe it is fair? maybe it isn't? not that fairness will change anything
maybe years from now i'll dig it up but for now i never want to see it again. i don't want any of it, not even the memories.

but i have good friends, very very good friends.
i have my family.
i have the sweetest boy.
i have tomorrow, i have today.
i've got the whole world.

baby, i'll be just fine.

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